I’m sure everyone deals with this. Maybe it’s a moon phase, or some Mercurial alignment issue, or a change in weather, or a switch to a beer with a higher alcohol content, but it’s time for one of those disruptive yet potentially inspiring dives, usually lasting a couple of weeks. Head first, into the waters of discovery and perspective, I have plunged.
We all want our jobs to have meaning, but brother, that sure is a hard figure to measure. Matthew Crawford wrote an essay for the New York Times about the contradictory value we put on people who live by their wits, backs, and hands for a living. I, like several of my friends from our small town high school, was programmed to go to college so that I can get a good job. You know, an office job. Because mowing grass for a living leads to a dead end. Crawford writes:
“High-school shop-class programs were widely dismantled in the 1990s as educators prepared students to become ‘knowledge workers’. The imperative of the last 20 years to round up every warm body and send it to college, then to the cubicle, was tied to a vision of the future in which we somehow take leave of material reality and glide about in a pure information economy. This has not come to pass. To begin with, such work often feels more enervating than gliding. More fundamentally, now as ever, somebody has to actually do things: fix our cars, unclog our toilets, build our houses.
When we praise people who do work that is straightforwardly useful, the praise often betrays an assumption that they had no other options. We idealize them as the salt of the earth and emphasize the sacrifice for others their work may entail. Such sacrifice does indeed occur — the hazards faced by a lineman restoring power during a storm come to mind. But what if such work answers as well to a basic human need of the one who does it?”
Right. The work of lineman can be personally fulfilling. Then consider those dissenters of the office cube world; it’s not uncommon for someone from my generation to quit the office job and go to work on an organic farm. Many people who work for the Information Man blatantly and openly voice their jealousy of people who sweat for a living.
So summarizing this argument, we can say that salty workers are generally happier than their cube worker peers, because: 1) they don’t have to deal with the absurdities of the office environment; 2) their work is easily defined, and; 3) there is usually a tangible result of the day’s labors, which brings fulfillment.
Now we enter the mind of a salty worker, for example, a landscaper. He’s standing in the front yard of a house that backs to Barton Creek, the vein that carries the sparkle and shine of Austin to its crown jewel, Barton Springs. The owner of this front yard has consulted with this landscaper, to find a way to reduce his $800+ monthly water bill and the 100,000 gallons of water he uses to keep his 1.5 acres of St. Augustine green and soft. The owner’s idea is to drill a well, and use that water for irrigation, thus saving environmental resources by greatly reducing his use of City-treated water. Then, get a list of organic products from the landscaper, and use them to replace the bottles of lawn chemicals in the tool shed. Take out the recycling bin on Thursdays, buy a Prius, and boom, save the world.
The path of least resistance here, for the landscaper, is to agree. For the landscaper who is a landscaper because he has “no other option”, this very path is the only path that exists in the universe. The actions required of this solution fall right in line with the three arguments for why the salty worker jobs are superior to cube worker jobs. Encourage the man to drill a well, apply an organic fertilizer on a regular basis, and keep that shit mowed. Check’s in the mail.
But what about this new breed of landscaper, the one scarred and mangled from his educational background and former career path as a cube worker, which he eventually rejected so he can purse a career that allows him to be physically spent at the end of each day? That juicy plum from the Tree of Knowledge taught him a few things after all, like the basic principles of hydrology and geology. A simple connection is made, and suddenly, the absurdity of drilling a well feels a lot like those loony tasks required of him in the cube of his former life. Now, his role in the situation becomes more complicated as he scrambles to be a diplomat between a fragile environmental resource and his paycheck. The outcome will not be tangible, and will require bending a mind before action can be taken. The Fruit is now poison, infecting the three arguments for the salty worker until they rot in a sad little puddle.
So: 1) he sweats for a living, which when you get past the glorification of the romance of such work, take its toll on the body if he’s not careful, and can turn that end-of-the-day fulfillment of his youth into pain-with-every-movement horror of his adulthood; and,
2) he’s still dealing with absurdities he thought he was escaping by leaving the office job, which makes;
3) his role a depressing shade of grey, rather than simple black and pure white.
The three arguments for the superiority of salty work over office work are obliterated.
On top of that, as a small business owner, this landscaper is juggling, somehow both sullenly and in desperate panic, obligations and responsibilities he didn’t sign up for: trucks that get stolen; employees who don’t show up for work; employees who get arrested; employees who completely disappear for weeks at a time; equipment that fails in masses, at all the same time, when he needs them the most; clients who want to squeeze as much service for as little money as possible; clients who value the truly local small business, but only when they’re the lowest bidder; clients who ignore the 99 awesome things he did and blow up at the single mis-communication in a single email; clients who want service, dedication, and quality, but don’t want to pay for it; self-centered business partners who always take and never give; trying to do the right thing and still stay competitive; trying to provide a beneficial community service and still stay profitable; trying to give clients what they want, when they want it, for a fair price, and still maintain a healthy relationship with his wife and son; trying to develop and demonstrate a more environmentally and financially sustainable business model for those who will come after him; and on and on and on.
Turns out the grass isn’t greener after all. There are cubers that stand on the edge, and leap with all their strength, realizing with horror as gravity delivers them to the salty world that, at a closer resolution, it isn’t covered in soft, lush, green grass after all. It’s actually a thin film of flesh-eating algae, deceptively masking a deep dark pit full of alligators, piranhas, sharks, and very sick people. The arguments for salty work disintegrate in the poisonous fog, and the promising dreams of independence and self-reliance are uncovered to reveal smothering monsters of unbearable weight and despair. It isn’t long before these poor souls take the walk of shame back to the other side, with a resigned relief to be back in the cube.
But, and here finally is my point, this is not the fate of everyone who is fooled by the three arguments, or the superficial lure of owning a business. Some of us, when discovering the truth of the deceptively green grass, still hang on. In this cold dark world, we find kindred spirits. We find clients who appreciate what we do, respect our efforts, and who look past our faults to see our strengths. We find employees who become friends, backed by a mutual respect and dependence on each other. We find a mechanic who smooths out the jagged wrinkles of uncertainty, vendors who evolve into mentors and role models, and competitors who become unofficial partners for a common cause. We find a rhythm in the volatility of business ownership, learn how to take advantage of our freedom instead of allowing it to crush us, and harness the potentially dangerous power of independence and use it for good.
And gradually, in our daily actions to support each other and keep bread on our tables, we twine invisible threads. We become a collective force, strong enough to resist the flesh-eating algae, alligators, piranhas, sharks, and very sick people, powerful enough to prevent anyone from crossing back over to the safe side. We overcome all the challenges that our ignorance kept us from anticipating and despite the mountains of circumstances that threaten to drag us down, we thrive and succeed.
We become a community.
It’s that one thing, community, that outweighs the disappointment of the three false arguments and negates the disparity of being a small business owner. It’s community that provides the inspiration, validation, and encouragement to counter the negative forces that threaten to drag me down and break me. Community, created by accident, born in response to all the bad things that are bound to happen, is the secret to happiness in my work.
It’s my community: my clients; my employees; my wife; my family; some of my fellow landscapers; the local vendors we rely on to keep our equipment and trucks running; fellow small-business owners who keep our website up to date and deliver bulk materials for us; vendors that provide us quality soil, mulch, plant, stone, gravel, and building materials to make us look good; local service providers that make it easy to dispose of our waste, recycle our brush, provide us with alternative fuels, and keep us efficient; local restaurants and food manufacturers that provide us with waste oil to fuel our trucks; and local farmers, editors, writers, poets, biologists, non-profits, long-time friends, musicians, and mamas who inspire us and back us up when we’re low.
God help me if I ever lose them, my posse, my people. It’s my community that, no matter what, keeps the grass browner on the other side.